If you work on Capitol Hill you see, hear, and overhear many things that the rest of the mortal world isn’t privy to. These privileged professionals that serve our US government acquire a wealth of knowledge that sometimes is just too good not to share. We’ve provided a platform on which they can unload.
CONFESSIONS OF A CAPITOL HILL STAFFER
Yes, You Should Make a Move On Your Office Crush
Common knowledge dictates that it’s a bad idea to date someone you work with. If you live anywhere but DC, that may be a good rule of thumb, but here in the Capitol City, those rules don’t apply. With constant professional movement, an endless supply of free happy hour booze, long hours, and oh-so-sexy cityscapes, this city was built for office romance.
In defiance of the naysayers who poo poo office romance, I offer you the following reasons why it’s okay to make a move on that hot little piece in the next cubicle over this Valentine’s Day.
It’s fun to keep secrets from your coworkers
It’s like an inside joke times a million. Keeping a sultry love affair in the office a secret can be exciting. Plus, who doesn’t like pretending they’re Demy and Jackie?
Making out in the office after hours is pretty sweet
Hooking up at the office would be the ultimate thrill for a Hill staffer. And if you’re dating your coworker, you’re only a few cubicles away from achieving the DC equivalent of the Mile High Club. Plus, it makes a great bar story… not that I know from experience.
It’s a good career move
Having a partner who will watch your back, introduce you to new people, and participate in witty banter at happy hours is clutch for any Hill staffer. Plus, you constantly have someone challenging your ideas, discussing important issues, and keeping you updated when you choose to sleep in rather than read the day’s headlines. You basically have a debate prep coach in your bedroom. How convenient!
You always have something to talk about
For normal people, there comes a point in every relationship where you’re out of new and exciting things to talk about. Your stories become stale and you’re forced to resort to repeat anecdotes and the soul crushing “how was your day? Fine. How was yours? Fine.” When you date your coworker, you always have a common interest. You always have something new to discuss. What’s better than someone who not only understands your career, but basically your political soul?
If it doesn’t work out, chances are that one or both of you will leave within six months
It’s true; everything about dating a coworker seems amazing until the inevitable breakup. It’s a risk, definitely. But hey, this is the Hill, not the Midwest. Professionals here are constantly switching jobs, changing careers, and moving up the preverbal ladder. If for whatever reason your love affair turns as icy as relations between Obama and the Republican Congress, fear not; there’s a 100 percent chance one or both of you will leave the office within six months.
Bonus Point: If you stay friends after your breakup, you can still use each other for networking, stimulating conversation, career advancement, and potential happy hour hookups that you’ll both laugh off over a homemade pop tart at Ted’s.