Posts Tagged

dinobots

Exhausted. That’s the word that best describes how you will feel after this movie. It is 2 hours and 45 minutes, not including previews. This movie is a chore. The CGI? Same as the last three movies. The acting? Are you kidding me?!?. The lack of Megan Fox? An unmitigated cinematic tragedy.  I’m not going dwell on the plot not making sense. Complaining about the plot not making sense in a Transformers movie is like bitching about the lack of flavor in a Natty Lite. What the else did you expect? There is no compelling reason why 165 minutes are necessary to tell a story about Marky Mark and handful of oversized, malleable Hot Wheels. Hell, the final battle lasted a full 30 (freaking) minutes. The saddest thing: It’s actually better than the last two Transformer movies. Decent step up of the characters, their connection to one another, and the overall plot (No matter how complicated and pretzel-like it might be). In fact, the first 1 and 45 minutes is NOT a complete train wreck. However, after this 45th minute, it’s straight downhill. Stilted dialog, predictable outcomes, and my goodness do the Transformers themselves sound stupid. Do me a favor: Don’t see this movie. Fireworks and beer are expensive. I’m saying you’re better off blowing up your money. Be your own version of Michael Bay.