The 20 Craziest Things You Can Buy From the Presidential Candidates’ Online Shops
It used to be that if you supported a particular candidate, you wore their pin. Needless to say, those days are long gone, and getting the bragging rights for the best presidential contender swag has become a competition of its own.
Last year, The New York Times criticized Ted Cruz’s lack of swag, which in-turn prompted him to most likely seek counseling and bolster his online shop with some of the greatest items we’ve seen. From yoga mats to grill gear, Cruz managed to get his groove back.
But he’s not alone, you can pick up designer t-shirts from Hillary’s store, and baby onesies from Bernie’s.
Though it’s been moved to the Clearance Rack after Rubio announced he was suspending his campaign, the Marco Rubio shop very well might be the answer to the late SkyMall, which was beloved by many. There you can purchase an “As Seen on TV” shattered Trump watch, which is a callback to Trump’s would-be second life path as a watch dealer in Manhattan.
The swag race is an intense one. Some candidates truly lack creativity (**cough** Kasich), while others shine with unconventional campaign gear– take Cruz’s coloring book for example.
Here at FamousDC, we took it upon ourselves to rally up the most intriguing items of the bunch– all available now for purchase, and all made in ‘Merica!
1. Hillary’s Progress Pint Glass Combo
Cheers to girl power with these glasses made from “100% shattered glass ceilings.” Set them on your coffee table during every debate and drink every time Hilary mentions her commitment to fighting for women’s rights and gender equality.
2. Trump’s Make America Great Again! Spirit Pom (set of 2)
Nothing makes Donald Trump happier than seeing a room full of pom poms ferociously waving in the air by proud supporters! At $10, these pom poms are a bargain.
3. Cruz’s “Breathe” Yoga Mat
For $35, you can be on your way to better health with this Cruz-branded yoga mat. I mean, what’s been holding you back from broadcasting your personal political views at yoga class. Get the conversation started with this purchase. Namaste.
4. Trump’s Dog Raglan
Even pooches can show their presidential pride! This stylish raglan comes in five sizes, sure to fit any breed.
5. Hillary’s “A Woman’s Place is in the White House” Stitch Throw Pillow
While she’s already lived in the White House as the First Lady, she means business, and wants to return as Commander in Chief. What a creative and ironic way to make a statement for women. We only ding her for the steep price– $55 folks.
6. Babie’s for Bernie Bib
It’s never too early to get your kids thinking about who should be the next POTUS. For just $15 you can have your little one spit up all over this Bernie bib.
7. Hillary’s Scrunchie
Scrunchies are back kids, thanks to Hillary. Rock yours at your next visit to the gym, or on a Monday to work, just because.
8. Cruz’s Right Turns Only Bumper Sticker
Nothing says “conservative” quite like slapping a sticker like this onto the back of your minivan. While the message might be confusing to drivers behind you in the left-turning lane, they’ll eventually pick up what you’re putting down.
9. Trump Solo Cups
We’re sure a lot of flip cup was played behind closed doors at Trump University. These popular beverage cups are selling out quickly, so grab a stack of them soon!
10. Bernie’s “Feel the Bern” Mug
A name like Bernie simply lends itself to coffee marketing. Feel the bern with this stylish mug, for “lefties” apparently. The product description comes with a cautionary warning: “You’ll definitely feel the Bern with this mug. No seriously, be careful. You’re gonna need those hands to vote for Bernie Sanders.”
11. Marc Jacobs Designer Tee for Hillary
Never thought you could afford Marc Jacobs? Well, now you can. Hillary teamed up with Marc for her campaign to create a limited-time tee that sells for $45. And it’s unisex, so anyone can wear it!
12. Trump’s “Make America Great Again” Camo Hat
The “Make America Great Again” hats are pretty iconic now. Even though this one is camo, we’re not sure it can be missed, or unseen for that matter. Whether this hat works for or against your style, it’s available now, for a limited time.
13. Marco’s Polo
As if this item was unavoidable. Get your Marco polo today, in your choice of three colors.
14. Ted Cruz Coloring Book
Perhaps the most head-scratching candidate shop item we found was this signature Ted Cruz coloring book. Shoppers aren’t able to preview the pages, so we have no idea what’s inside. Buy at your own risk. *Crayons not included.
15. Hillary’s Everyday Pantsuit Tee
Get a half-a-suit corny t-shirt over at Hillary’s shop. Not only has she brought scrunchies back, but also pantsuits. She’s rather fond of them, and even calls herself a “pantsuit aficionado” on her Facebook page.
16. Cruz’s Grill Spatula
Starting this month, you can buy a Ted Cruz-branded spatula complete with a maple handle. The guy must of had a feeling he’d still be on the campaign trail come outdoor grilling season.
17. Rubio’s “Buy Marco a Plane Ticket” Option
Show your appreciation with a $500 sponsorship to fly Marco around on the campaign trail. In return, you will receive: recognition on Twitter and MarcoRubio.com during the day of Marco’s trip, a postcard from Marco’s travel signed by Marco and the team, and personal update on the day from a team member. Now that is a DEAL!
18. Rubio’s BAE T-Shirt
If you’re on team Marco, then you definitely need to pick up this tee in your size. There’s nothing embarrassing about it. Facebook might one day remind you of the day you proudly wore your BAE shirt to a Rubio campaign rally, and you’ll have nothing but fond memories.
19. Rubio’s Trump Watch
As Seen on TV! If Trump hadn’t inherited $200 million, he would be selling watches on the streets of Manhattan. $10 to the highest biddah’!
20. Rubio’s “Freedom of Espresso” Mug
Support Marco’s campaign by sipping your cup of jo from a clever mug like this one. While the espresso mug looks pretty large in the shop, we assure you that it is a “little Marco” mug.