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In case you’re wondering why your Republican friends aren’t responding to your emails today — it’s because they’re doing keg stands at CPAC.

And if they’re at CPAC, that means they will be partaking in the annual straw poll.

The choices, as listed in order on the ballot:

Mississippi Gov. Haley Barbour
Indiana Gov. Mitch Daniels
Big Bird
Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich
Former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee
A yet to be named character from Family Guy
Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin
Rep. Ron Paul
Ron Paul’s shadow
Rep. Mike Pence
Glenn Beck’s Alter Ego
Strawberry Shortcake
Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney
Former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum
Flavor Flav
Sen. John Thune
And a third round draft pick from the Tea Party movement

UPDATE: Late addition — Betty White