Ever wonder what the best way to watch a Presidential debate is? Well, it’s with friends, bingo cards, snacks, and partisan Jello shots. We had our own pre-debate soiree in Cleveland last night, but in case you didn’t make the guest list, here are a few tips for watching the rumble on your own…
1. Drinks: There are only two states in which to watch the debate: drunk and sober, but only one of those ways is Ladies Who Lobby approved – hence the Jello shots.
2. More Drinks: If Jello isn’t your thing please refer to our earlier recommendations. Note: Drinking is a nonpartisan issue and a bipartisan activity. Just ask James and Mary.
3. Food: Eat like the candidates are behaving… childishly. Mini hot dogs! Nachos! Pizza! Chicken Nuggets! Little slices of fat Americana.
4. Activities: While many in DC are very into politics, we all have those friends who would rather be watching football. So we need to keep them entertained. And this means games… drinking games, bingo, gambling if you so dare! Twister for the weird ones… left foot “blue collar.”
5. Attire: Show your stripes. Whether you are a Republican or a Democrat, make it known. And if you are an “independent” or “undecided” (what?) this is like the Superbowl… pick a side!
6. Ambiance: Set the mood – we’re not talking candles and Marvin Gaye (Let’s Get It On). We’re talking streamers… we’re talking foam fingers… we’re talking balloons.
7. Television: We feel it goes without mentioning, but you need a platform to watch the debate on. Don’t sell yourself short by watching it on an iPad. You’re gonna want to be up close and personal with all that Donald Trump flow.
8. What About: Your pocket Constitution. Get in the Spirit of things old school style. Be able to point to the first amendment when someone gives you side eye for making fun of Rand Paul’s height or Ted Cruz’s facial expressions.
9. Clean Up Crew: We all know debates have winners. In fact, I bet Wolf Blitzer will tell you ten minutes before the debate ends (CNN… giggle). So that means members of the losing party are on clean up duty.
10. A Good Excuse: If you work in DC, everyone will know what you were up to last night. So maybe your dog, Seamus died? So maybe your vice presidential candidate pulled his quadricep doing P90X? Or maybe the Metro is taking sides and the red/blue lines just sucked?
Bonus tips for interactive debate watching:
Smile and nod condescendingly.
Hand gestures are key to any good argument.
Exaggerate all reactions.
If things get out of hand, mediate.
Other than that… enjoy!