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Usain Bolt proved again last night that trying to keep up with him is an exercise in futility. While that’s true, maybe we can be inspired by his speed and try to pick up the pace ever so slightly.

Here are our top 5 things in DC that could use even a fraction of Usain Bolt’s speed:


The Streetcar

Not only was it way over budget and a logistical nightmare that ultimately does not add much in the way of actually getting around the city, but it rides within the flow of traffic. That’s right, it cost too much AND ultimately slows us down.



The Metro – every line, any time of day

This summer has been Metro’s worst summer ever. Even on its best day the Metro lets its riders down, but this summer it hasn’t even tried to work.




Want to sit in traffic at 10 PM on a Saturday night? 3 PM Sunday? 8 AM Wednesday? Take a sweet ride on 66 and it’s sure never to disappoint.



The line at Whole Foods on P Street

If you are looking to get some good cheese and overpriced bread for a nice Sunday afternoon, you better plan ahead. Otherwise you will be stuck in line at Whole Foods for… a while. Totally worth it in the end though.

P Street prof


The line at Sweetgreen on the Hill in recess

Yes, everyone takes advantage of recess and the reprieve from Longworth cafeteria. Yes, waiting in the line and paying too much for your salad is ultimately worth it.


OK, so we’re slow in this city, but we are still the fittest in the country. Maybe, eventually, if we keep trying, we will catch up with Usain Bolt’s shadow one day. Probably not. Love you anyway, D.C.