We figured out the key to DC’s heart- its favorite things to do. Once you read the list, you’ll have to admit least three of these are also your favorite hobbies.
So, maybe you can’t run more than 3 miles without huffing and puffing, or maybe you want to relive your high school athlete glory days — either way, you step up to that kickball plate and give it your all. Chances are you’ve seen people wearing NAKID shirts around town. (Yes, we thought it was weird the first time we saw that too, but it’s legit.) Talk some trash (OR you’re already trashed), get some weird tan lines, meet some new ‘friends’ who you would never associate with outside of the social sports league. But all that really matters is where you go AFTER the game for lots of cheap beer, flip cup, and memories that last a lifetime.
BRUNCH OR DIE TRYING
If brunch were a sport, the people of D.C. would be the MVPs of it. Two words, Bloody Mary. It’s Saturday at noon? Let’s get wasted. Sunday? Drunk again by 1:30 p.m. Who cares if these eggs are runny and the bacon is too burnt, you’re a bitch who brunches! (Shout out to “Bitches Who Brunch,” greatest DC brunch blog, drinking bottomless mimosas and shooting the sh*t with a group of friends.) By afternoon your hangover kicks in and you look around wondering how you go there. “I’m never drinking again!” you say… Well, until the next brunch.
CHAT IT UP
Brian from that newspaper? Mary from the lobbying group? Joe from the Hill? You know them ALL — and everything about them. Why? Because you are the networking master. Every happy hour, gala, free class on politics or Senate hearing, there you are, networking your butt off. Sometimes you ask yourself, “are these people even my friends?” It’s a gift and a curse, but as a pro-networker, you have just about everything (and everyone) in D.C. covered. “We should get coffee sometime!” are the 5 most powerful words you know.
Apparently D.C. is one of the most fit cities in the country — although you wouldn’t think that based on how many people ride the bus… Ah, we digress. What really matters is that you are going to Bar Method, or running the steps at Meridian Hill Park if it kills you. $150 a month to workout at VIDA on U Street? DUH! You throw on those overpriced lululemons and go work up a sweat. If you want to get anywhere in D.C., you better be looking good because if someone out there is better looking than you, good luck getting your cause heard.
Today someone told us that community gardens are a “thing” in DC. We are still trying to confirm, if you are part of this new garden “trend” please email us and help us out with our confusion. (We hear it’s quite competitive.)
In our opinion, the culture scene in D.C. is quite underrated. How many music venues are in the area? Are you are subscribed to 930 Club and Black Cat mailing list? You’ve been to a badass rave or deep secrets party at “interesting” locations. You go to U Hall 3 times a week. The terms Moobahton Massive, Deep House Fridays, and Backbar actually mean something to you. You most likely live in a questionable neighborhood of sorts to be able to afford concerts every week. Observation: When you go to Echostage you fear for your life — and definitely for the generation to come.
ALL I DO IS BLOG, BLOG, BLOG
If your creativity is high enough, you are a blogger with a household name. How do these people do it?! Apparently, your interests are blog worthy and other people find your opinions worthwhile. Food or fashion? Where to be or what to do? Your email list is quite substantial and your Twitter following is 5 digits. Ramble on about whatever is on your mind — and be praised for it! Wait… isn’t that what we’re doing right now…
#NATITUDE, #HTTR, #CAPS
You live in the nation’s capital, so sports teams here have to be the chosen ones, right? Throw on your red, white and blue (although those aren’t the colors of the Redskins at all) and cheer on the local D.C. area professional sports teams. Nats, ‘Skins, Caps, DC United, Kastles… You love America’s teams! No, you LOVE America! The good thing is that you can get to all of the sporting arenas by public transportation (cough, FedEX Field) and tickets rarely go over $20 a piece. We won’t lie though, we love @RGIII.
What’s your favorite series? Homeland, West Wing, Veep, House of Cards? Let’s just say you’re the type of person who likes to live vicariously through some of your favorite television personalities (i.e., Frank Underwood, Olivia Pope, Jed Bartlet, Selina Meyer). You may be just too tired to have another hobby, or maybe just too boring. IT IS OKAY. The fact is you just really enjoy your bed and sweatpants, and you ALWAYS have something to contribute to the Keurig conversation in the office on Monday morning. #DCWIN.
SCHOOL AND SUCH
You work full-time and go to grad school part-time. That is all.
LOVE IS IN THE AIR
You’re single and for some reason, unable to meet anyone around town. …Even though we’ve provided a full list of hobbies above where you can meet people. Turn to the Internet and the comfort of your own 4 walls to dip your toes in the dating pool. Tinder and Hinge, this one’s for you.