What would happen if reality shows were based in the District…
Survivor – Intern Wars: Tribes of white badged interns compete in a series of challenges (first contestant to actually get around Rayburn wins!). The surviving intern gets upgraded to the ever coveted staff assistant spot. Those who get kicked off the island go back to grad school.
Money Metro: WMATA wisely decides to invest in metro cars with flashy disco lighting and lets customers who have been stranded during their commute compete in a trivia challenge to recoup their wasted fare.
Cake Boss: Georgetown Cupcake and Sprinkes fight it out like the Sharks and Jets.
What Not to Wear – Casual Friday: Just because you have plans after work on Friday doesn’t make that mini skirt and sequined bandeau appropriate. Offending contestants are required to wear overalls the remainder of the workday.
The Amazing Race: Happy Hour Contestants bolt from the office at 5pm to try to get the best bar stools and the biggest buzz on before 7pm.
Say Yes to the Dress – Pantsuit Pandemonium: Watch as Lohmans and Dress Barn open their doors in a blowout sale. See hair fly when the last matching blazer goes out the door.
The Biggest Loser – Electoral College Edition: Poor Mitt.
Fear Factor DC: It’s 2am, you’re on H Street and can’t find a cab—how long can you make it before Ubering? You wake up Saturday morning and see the Intern Badge of Courage on your hookup’s nightstand—Do you sneak out the window? The front door? Or stay for breakfast?
The Bachelor/ette: Really nothing new here. Contestants just aren’t as attractive.
Catfish DC: He said he was a Democrat but you discover he is a Libertarian. A disappointment akin to Ron Paul’s Presidential bid.
The Real World – Capitol Hill: Follow the lives of several Senators and Representatives living in a group house on the Hill. Stay tuned for when Representative Paul Ryan attempts to get Representative Ed Markey to read the complete works of Ayn Rand.
So You Think You Can Opine? Supreme Court Justices take the stage to jitterbug and samba the night away. Expect fewer flashy costumes but look forward to a special guest appearance by Malia Obama.
Here Comes Joe Biden: This explains itself.