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UPDATE: Stuff Hill People Like highlight Big Byrd as #13

The Hill newspaper got it wrong today when they reported on Senator Byrd telling his critics to “shut up.”

What the editors at one of Capitol Hill’s leading newspapers failed to realize was – the story wasn’t about Byrd telling his critics to piss off, rather, the story was about the fact that Old Man Senate stayed awake long enough to do so.

Sen. Robert Byrd (D-W.Va.) took control of his own narrative Wednesday by managing a two-hour Senate Appropriations Committee hearing on the Iraq war that for the time being silenced critics who say he’s no longer fit to serve as chairman.

Byrd, who has been the center of rumors about a possible coup- is apparently well enough to know that people want him gone as chairman.

Byrd knows that he is the most closely watched senator on Capitol Hill. He is aware that he’s the subject of whispers, private meetings and even a possible coup. Yet he kept his words short after chairing his first Appropriations hearing since September and twice being hospitalized this year.

When the hearing ended, his only words for his critics were, “Shut up.” He seemed to pass the test, convincing three Senate Democratic leaders that he’s able to continue as chairman.

One fellow colleague quickly came to Byrd’s defense: [insert brown nose]

“Today was a good sign,” said Schumer. “Everybody wants Sen. Byrd to recover and get back to running the Appropriations Committee.”

Harry Reid, who’s not looking for any favors, was not so kind in reference to Byrd and his ability to stay awake for nearly two hours.

“We’ll wait and see how that works out,” Reid said.

When asked for further comment, Byrd did not respond – he only snored.