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According to the Washington Examiner , Real World producers can’t guarantee that you won’t get a STD. They can however guarantee a life full of D-list opportunities and strange rashes. [wash] Note: We’re kind of glad we didn’t have to do the research on this one. h/t Tara

When running for Congress, it is NOT okay to take target practice at your opponent.  [WTF] At a Republican party meeting held at a gun range, Robert Lowrey (R), the candidate challenging Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz (D-FL) in Florida’s 20th congressional district, "fired at a full-body silhouette with ‘DWS’ written …

The Hill Is Home: Beer on the Hill When I was in first grade, I wanted to be a cocktail waitress when I grew up. I was five years old and had just been shoved into some gifted program at my school, but for open house we had to draw …

Maybe the world felt the need to apologize for not giving him the Olympics … we heard they were going to give him all the gold medals from the 2016 games but figured that might be over doing it. Seriously, if the standard is what it is, which is apparently …

Have a good weekend and remember to ACT RIGHT.

Facebook Status Abuse: Matt is at the doctors for semi-annual inappropriate touching session. Matt, put down the blackberry and turn your head and cough. Now promise us you’ll never tweet from the doctor’s office again. Do you know someone who abuses Facebook ? Report them below. [contact-form 3 "Facebook Alerts"]

Is the Levi Johnston Twitter account real?  Or is this another attempt attempt at faking someone’s identity. [insert Frank Luntz] @notlarrysabato thinks it’s fake: @LeviJohnston05 If this account was real, I think you would use a picture that wasn’t from a publicly available commercial. So does @williambutler: @LeviJohnston05 I’d still …

Obama is hosting a basketball game tonight at the White House. According to Roll Call , only 15 invites were shelled out – but only two went to Republican lawmakers. Those who will be suiting up include Reps. Michael Arcuri (D-N.Y.), John Boccieri (D-Ohio), Brad Ellsworth (D-Ind.), Jeff Flake (R-Ariz.), …

Tricky [trash ] Slanket [Snuggie ] Air Force One [stinky ]

Frozen Bird: Twitter users have pointed out that their Twitter updates have gotten "frozen in time" and that their feeds have not been refreshing with new posts. [chirp] If Facebook freezes, the government will shut down.

Sen. Claire McCaskill’s Missouri Tigers are playing Sen. Ben Nelson’s Nebraska Corn Huskers tonight and the office rivalry is heating up. The Hart Senate Office Building might as well be a freshman dorm. The rolling prank war between hallmates Sens. Claire McCaskill and Ben Nelson is back on, with McCaskill …

What a total crapper for my fantasy teams this week. I had to leave to Austin for a wedding and when I got there I had too much to drink and forgot to do my lineups. I had guys on bye week starting. I got my ass handed to me. …

The Gregory Brothers are blowing up. Jimmy Kimmel Live — T Pain remixes President Obama’s health care plan with a little help from The Gregory Brothers and the infamous autotune

Gov. Sanford is so unlucky, it’s beginning to rub off on people around him.  [can’t catch a break] South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford’s (R) car was pulled over for speeding and a video from a dashboard camera shows the trooper asking the driver, "You got a good reason for running …